musings of a lost American

Now, maybe its because I grew up romanticizing everything in the world, making it out to be grander than it is.  Then again, I've been through my own personal hell and back, so it could be a coping mechanism to keep me sane.  Or maybe its because I grew up dreaming, wanting a better America for my own future, and the other futures to come.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we need a new Congress.
 
So, I have become disenchanted with our current America.  Maybe its because I grew up in a small town in Iowa, where I was encouraged to chase my dreams, and that the only person that can stop me is myself.  I grew up believing that if everyone worked hard, we could make a better world.

Some would argue this is just a part of growing up.  Having to deal with an imperfect world.  And I can believe that and rationalize it.  But honestly, I don't want to.  Sure, we are all cogs in a machine, but what if the machine isn't running at optimum strength?  What if that machine was wasting away potential energy?  In the black and white of economics, if the machine operates inefficiently, either fix the problem or build a new machine that runs better.  Now, building a new machine would be difficult because you still have all the same parts.  But fixing the machine really only will be a temporary fix that will require fixing again in the near future.  So what should we do?  Innovate.  All the little cogs in America need a retooling.  We've been fixing the cogs for way too long, and the result is that we have fewer and fewer American products as a result.  Many jobs are overseas.  New jobs are being created, and I witness that locally with a fast growing tech industry in Silicon Valley, but they are for a particular subset of our college educated.  The tech industry is creating more tech jobs, which in turn should generate more industry and manufacturing jobs.  But they don't.  They ship their work overseas.  Now, I know not EVERYONE does this, but there is a large enough portion of not only the tech industry, but the general American corporations that participate in this.

Now I grew up hearing my parents talk about where they were when President Kennedy was shot, and where they were when Neil Armstrong took his first step on the moon.  I grew up on Star Wars, I grew up dreaming of going to space and finding other civilizations.  I dreamed of the world becoming a unified place, not divided factions.  I dreamed about a lot of things.  Now I look around, and all I see are people talking about this next video game or having their face glued to their phone.  I am just as guilty as the other person.  It has resulted in a society that is paralyzed.  In all honesty, I feel silly chastising technology as I will use it to get this message out.  Call me a hypocrite.  But this is about being rational, not fanatical.

I remember an America where one was proud to own a Chevy, or a Ford or GM vehicle.  Now you're considered a hick by some if you prefer to only buy American automobiles.  I remember an America when people were proud to have a factory job.  Now it seems society looks down upon that, encouraging companies to ship the jobs overseas to a cheaper work force, all in the name of saving a buck or two, while most likely still polluting the world further, and in an unsafe work environment.  And most of that saved money is not going back to the workers, its going back to the upper management, who pat themselves on the back for earning more money so they can keep traveling the world.  I remember an America where children played outside all day.  Now they sit inside playing video games, or worse doing all sorts of extra curricular activities so they can go to Harvard.  I grew up on playing outside, and I can still hold a conversation with people, and also apply critical thinking to various topics.

So where is America?  We have an economic crisis.  The new, young workforce that is having what could be one of the hardest starts in the workforce for new college graduates.  Not to mention the every growing pile of college debt either...

I hate to admit it, but Obama hasn't done a great job instilling a sense of America in me.  Sure, he got bin Laden.  That's pretty cool.  Yes, he bailed out the auto industries, which I am thankful for now.  But that's about it.  Everything else is lots of political deadlock.  All I see is a Congress hell bent on making sure a president isn't re-elected.  A Congress NOT LOOKING OUT FOR THE AMERICAN PEOPLE.  A do nothing Congress that has resulted in some manner the down grade of United States credit.  A Congress that has stood still on every issue possible.  And both parties are guilty.  No I don't have evidence, but I am sure as hell going to start digging.  I watch as politicians are more worried about their selves, not their constituents.  Many politicians have been in their seats for several terms now (I politely look toward the two senior senators in Iowa).  I believe its time we removed incumbents who are not looking towards helping the public.  I say we vote in fresh blood.  Sure, lots of freshmen politicians running around will result in tons of unwanted mistakes, but it could forge a new core group of politicians who have their best interests in America.

Get rid of Beohner and Pelosi and all the other higher ups.  But please keep John McCain.  I like him.  He says what he thinks and doesn't play games that often.  Plus he's an actual veteran, serious kudos for that.

But above all, I want an America to be proud of, and America that will inspire future generations to work towards even happier times, where we can move away from the corruption of this generation in power, and move towards an America we all can participate in again.

Also, thank you for reading all the way through this.  I'm sorry that a meme doesn't provide a concise statement of my thoughts and feelings.

tears in rain

So I have returned to my blog, that I write in so rarely.  But it is a fun way to write down musings in my life as I begin philosophical debates in my brain.  And today's debate is:  The meaning of Blade Runner.

Now, yes, it is a very hard movie to watch.  Many things do not make sense in the film, and some are the result of cheap plot movement necessities.  But the over arching meaning to this movie is only unlocked in the second to last scene of the film, and only then does the social commentary become even vaguely apparent.

And I'm not ready to really discuss my thoughts on this on paper yet.  this is a very meaningful topic that I believe can touch each individual in its own way, and should be left to that, not to be shown what it means.  Blade Runner is an individuals experience and what they value in life.  There is to be no handout on this one folks, you must discover the meaning, your own meaning.  Only then can one come to understand the wonder and impact of this film and its possibilities on society.  It's a shame no one bothers to sit down and watch a movie anymore (or that no one tries to make great meaningful A-list movies that aren't canned emotions)

more postulations

so,

I've had some more thoughts. These are more along musical lines, but still applicable in some manners. Well not really. more like humor.

Bruckner - JRR Tolkien of music. Its great, but damn there are so many details.

Brahms - Conservative wizard of the romantic genre.

Mahler - My pain shall be released upon my ascension to a higher plane. By the way, has anyone seen my wife?

Wagner - Very angry little man

[i've got a bad feeling about this]

musings upon Gustav

So I've got a sweet tooth for Gustav Mahler. His music just seems like the greatest thing ever to my ears (except for Coldplay, how can anyone hate Coldplay...oh wait. They're Coldplay, thats why).

Beyond just Mahler's music, I've delved into the contemporary academic material the has been produced concerning Mahler, and I'm trying to work my way up to the La Grange volumes. One of the things I have had a bit of trouble has been wrapping my head around the traditional groupings of his works, and more specifically his symphonies. While to take only his symphonies and compare them is somewhat an injustice in leaving out the vocal works, I view it as serving a purpose of reaching a better understanding on how Mahler's musical ideas changed and evolved.

The traditional groupings of the major works as I understand are as follows

Songs of a Wayfarer

Symphony 1

Wunderhorn settings

Symphony 2

Symphony 3

Wunderhorn settings

Symphony 4

Symphony 5

Symphony 6

Symphony 7

Symphony 8

Das Lied von Erde

Symphony 9

Symphony 10

Of the later symphonies I have no qualms with the groupings. Its really the first two groupings that I take issue with. To lay out the traditional reasoning

Sympohny 1's original program was to be about a hero, or titan. Since Mahler ultimately rejects all the programs he wrote for this symphonies, there is no true story, but the first symphony none the less retained the nickname 'Titan'. Its assumed that the first symphony is the rise and fall of said hero. The second symphony, nicknamed 'Resurrection' is just that. The Resurrection of the hero from the first symphony.

At this point, the musicology lesson is going to end temporarily as I research and formulate a stronger argument that I would like to present.

[I'm rather embarrassed, General Solo, but it appears you are to be the main course at a banquet in my honor.]

the philosophical adventures of a human floor level

So,

I've been doing lots of thinking recently. And yes, real thinking and not what kind of latte I'm going to have. Lots of deep philosophical thinking (rare for a trombone player). While these are much more fun bouncing them off of a person and having an intellectual discussion over it, I've come to realize (or rediscover) some interesting points in life over the past week. Also, I completely get why these blogs exist now. It's so people can run their philosophical minds around in circles and feel self important and that they are the next Socrates. Well, this is another possibility of these blogs existence's. They're still

How do we define ourselves?

This is a fun little notion I stumbled upon the other day. We all view ourselves as being made up of different components, characteristics, facets, what ever word you want you use. We're made up of parts. But the parts are the labels that are not just unique to ourselves. So therefore we define ourselves with predetermined, defined labels to better associate ourselves with others. People that have brothers can share that experience. People who value white chocolate lattes can share that experience (sadly). Those who play music no matter the genre can share that bond. These defined labels define who we are. But at the same time, we're all individuals. The labels that everyone can relate to at the same time create a unique situation in every person. The question I pose is, do we define ourselves as several parts or do we define ourselves as individuals, a single unit, summed by our parts? Would I introduce myself as a neanderthal trombonist who secretly hides an intellect that values characteristics like honor and duty? Or do I just introduce myself as Christian?

The second thought is one I never really vocalize, but one that is always on my mind. People pay me to play a hunk of metal, and I'm seeking to make a living out of a hunk of metal. Irony is such a wonderful thing.

So that's what's been on the mind as of recent. Now to go shrink away for the next decade after all the mindful thinking this week.

[why you stuck up, half witted, scruffy looking nerf herder]